One of my favorite things about Brody being added to our lives has been to watch Jeff be a Dad. He is so careful with him and you can just tell that he is so proud to call Brody his son. He refused to let me hold him, even for a second, during our three hour church session on Sunday. He wanted to be  sure that he was the one to show off our little guy to everyone. While I have been trying to sleep train Brody, it is so hard for Jeff to hear his little man cry in his room. After around two minutes of listening to his whines, Jeff can’t take it anymore and HAS to go and rescue him. While this is not the best technique for what I’m trying to achieve with Brody’s sleeping habits, I can’t blame him. Those cries are so sad, and it also makes me so happy that Jeff cares so much about our little Brody. Brody is so lucky to have Jeff as his dad. I know that Jeff will always be there for Brody and I am excited to witness all the special Dad-Son experiences that they will have together.

On the weekends Brody and I get to spend extra one on one time together. Jeff works on Fridays, Saturdays, and Sundays. Usually these shifts make it so he doesn’t return home until 1:30 in the morning. Last night, after I took my friend Jackie home, Brody was fast asleep in his carseat. He looked so peaceful and so cute in that moment. After we got home, I sat his carseat on the carpet and knelt down just to look at my little son sleeping peacefully there, all wrapped up in multiple blankets. Finally, I removed his blankets, unbuckled his straps, and took his limp, sleepy, little body from out of his carseat. I wrapped him up again in one of his warm blankets and just layed with him on the couch. I just stared at his little face. I thought about some of the things this little guy will someday experience. He is going to someday learn to count. He is going to someday take his first step. He is going to someday be a big brother. He is going to someday have his first day at Kindergarden. He is going to someday fall and scrap his little perfect knee. He is going to someday lose his first tooth. These little moments ran through my mind as a stared at his little face last night. I am so thankful that I get to be his mom and experience all of these small moments with him. I am excited to watch him grow and see what type of boy he becomes, and then see what type of man he becomes later. It is hard for me to believe that all these things and more will happen to this tiny little baby that I now can hold and cuddle right in my arms. I remember thinking that this is one of the only times in both of our lives that I can kiss his cute little face all over and he won’t say, “Mom, stop that.” Because I know that day will come. This is also one of the only times where he does fit into my arms and we can just lie on the couch and cuddle for hours, falling asleep until Dad gets home.

I must say, our little guy looked especially handsome on his first day of three hour church on Sunday. He did awesome as well. Jeff held him, bounced him, and played with him the whole time. A distraction during Sunday School.. what more could Jeff ask for? However, his cute little outfit didn’t last long.. Brody decided it would be fun to pee all over it after about an hour and half. Thankfully I had packed a spare outfit in my diaper bag. This is our Brody in his second outfit.. he still managed to stay cute for all the ladies at church.

Its a different feeling for me to carry a diaper bag everywhere I go when I’m with Brody. The other day someone asked for a wipe and I think I was a BIT too excited about first, being a person who has wipes, and second, being able to offer my wipe services. I have everything I need in my handy diaper bag.. especially for Mr. Peeboy.

Mr. Peeboy: Brody aquired this name yesterday, when he.. well… peed all over his face. No, I’m unfortunately not joking. I was changing his diaper, holding up his skinny little legs, Brody was as content as can be, when I hear this little whine. I look up, and what do you know.. Brody is peeing all over his onsie, the changing table, and his entire face. I was mortified. Is pee in your eyes dangerous? I hope not because Brody definitely had good aim towards both his left and his right. Bath time followed quickly after that episode. I need to learn my lesson one of these days… diaper change= time to place the wipe on the area where damage may happen.

For the first two weeks of Brody’s little life, our apartment was filled with family. Brody was never put down for more than five minutes before the next loving aunt, grandma, grandpa, great grandma, mom, or dad came by and snatched him back up again. He was spoiled for sure. This weekend Jeff worked three straight days, like he usually does, and I was left alone with Brody. Friday night Brody and I hung out and I enjoyed holding him, feeding him, playing with him, and having him all to myself without anyone else wanting to touch him. Saturday though, I realized what we had turned this little guy into. Brody was a baby with an obsession, an obsession for being held… at all times. I realized that he wouldn’t even sleep content without being in my arms. That night, I didn’t eat dinner, clean the house, get up to turn on the TV, brush my teeth, change into my pajamas, or anything else that included leaving Brody’s and my spot on the couch. That sounds so lazy of me! And it is. I was being controlled by my little baby. When he was hungry, I’d sit there and feed him until he fell asleep. Then he would be asleep, and since he would wake up when I tried to sit him down, I’d sit there until he woke up. When he’d wake up, he’d be hungry, and so my “If You Give a Mouse a Cookie” senario would start back over again. By the end of the night, it was decided, some change needed to be made.

You get my point. So while I was reading about how to train Brody, I was also taking notes on how to train myself to get out of these habits and into some better ones.

For those of you who are unfamiliar with Babywise, it is an informative book on raising babies. It talks about everything from breastfeeding to sleeping habits. What they are most known for is their program to get your baby to sleep through the night. While Brody had been sleeping great through the night, I needed to figure out how to have him do this alone, in his own bed. After reading the book, I created his Babywise schedule. This is a schedule filled with a feeding time, wake time, and sleep time every 2 1/2 hours throughout the day.

At first Brody was not used to being just put into his pack and play and left without anyone there rocking him or holding him. This forced him to make this sound come out of his mouth that breaks my heart and causes me to sweat everytime I hear it.. I think it’s called a cry. On Sunday night, Jeff was at work again, and I was feeling as though I was being put through torture listening to my little guy cry. Boy how ten minutes of crying can feel like a century.

It is Thursday now and I am pleased to announce that Brody has not slept in our bed since that Sunday night. I like to believe that he enjoys his pack and play now. Yesterday I came to check on him during one of his sleep times and he was just chilling in there, looking around and sucking on his little Seahawks pacifier. Most of the time, he doesn’t even cry when I lay him down to go to sleep anymore. He takes five naps a day and sleeps through the night, only waking up once when he is hungry. Jeff and I really couldn’t have asked for an easier baby.

If I have learned anything from putting Brody on this schedule it is that all babies really do is eat and sleep. I don’t know why this surprised me so much but I just never noticed it before. Him sleeping on the couch or in our arms didn’t really feel like he was asleep as much as placing him into his bed to go to sleep does. Babywise is working for us though. I am able to get a lot more accomplished now than I was that Saturday night. Thank goodness, cause that was bad! Brody seems even happier and more content than before since he is getting so much sleep and is getting so used to this consistent schedule.

I always enjoy having my family visit us. However, this time was different. I loved getting to see everyone meet little Brody. I loved watching their expressions on their faces and the careful way they held him and played with him. I loved hearing them fight over who’s turn it was to hold him. I loved the way hours would pass so quickly when the only entertainment in the room was this tiny, perfect baby. I loved being Brody’s mom in these moments and knowing the that little guy was mine. I loved seeing how much love surronded Brody and I loved knowing that this love for him will always be with him. He’s such a lucky little boy.

Going back to the end of 2011.. Jeff and I hopped in the car, drove to Boise, ID, and flew from there to Washington for a week and a half during the Christmas season! It was such a fun trip. We love being able to spend time with family. Plus, this was the first time any of my family got to see my little baby bump! One of the main events, for me at least, was the great baby shower that my family threw for me with the help of some close family friends. The Peterson’s house was filled with so many people that I’ve missed so much. I truely felt loved that day for sure.

My lovely sisters helping me organize the many gifts Brody and I received.

My beautiful Mom and me ❤

Quincy made this cake!!

My friends from High School that I hadn’t seen in forever.

Some time after returning home, Jeff and I got maternity pictures taken. These pictures really made me excited for the fact that we were pregnant and soon would meet our little boy in just a few short months. Here are a few of them:

To my surprise, two of my friends from Rexburg decided to throw me another baby shower!! Quincy was even able to make it up for it as well! (Quincy visited multiple times during last semester. She is going to live with us next year in Provo and I am way excited.)

I traveled up to Provo in February to house hunt with Quincy. This was a LOT harder than it sounded. At the end of the day, we were frustrated, sun burnt, hot, pregnant (oh, that was just me) and tired. I had a test the following day so I had to travel all the way back to Rexburg that night. Quincy was worried about me getting there safely in my condition.. so she came home with me. I was so happy and even more relieved.

In the midst of our exhaustion that long day.

We did find a place to live. We finalized it weeks later after playing tug-of-war with the management of a three bedroom duplex that we are now in love with. In the end though, we have a place come the end of August and we can’t wait to move down there and start some new adventures!!
I got more pregnant…

33 weeks

& more pregnant…

35 weeks

& even more pregnant.

This picture was actually taken right before Jeff and I went bowling with some friends.. which happened to be the night before I went into labor. (39 weeks and 5 days)

For Chloe and my mom’s spring break, they decided to come to Rexburg. I knew my mom was coming, but boy was I surprised when Chloe hopped out of the trunk!! Quincy also traveled down for a few days as well. We were all crossing our fingers that Brody would join the bunch that week, but he had other plans.

Oh, just Chloe and me pulling some April Fool’s Day Pranks

The new stroller Brody’s nana bought for him.

I endured the rest of my semester. With 17 credits, working two jobs, girls looking me up and down in the hallways, back and rib aches, exhaustion, and impatience, I consider this a big accomplishment. Jeff put up with a cranky pregnant girl well while he juggled work and school along with the miscellaneous tasks that I ordered him to complete since they HAD to be done before the baby came. Such as- washing the blinds, cleaning the doors, rearranging the furniture, vaccumming every single part of the carpet, and under every item in the house, scrubbing the tub, and hanging up the odds and ends in the nursery. He was a team player, that’s for sure.

But Brody came, and life is good.

At 39 weeks, I was desperate for Brody to arrive. Friday of finals week was finally over, Jeff’s and my full schedule of classes had come to an end, my job of grading papers and tutoring students was over, and Spring Break had finally started. “Let’s get this show on the road, Brody,” was constantly running through my head. Earlier that morning I had went in for my weekly checkup, and I explained to the doctor how badly I wanted to have this baby. After talking me out of an induction, he told me about the process of stripping my membranes. I agreed to do this in hopes of it putting me into labor sooner than later. All day Saturday I had menstrual-like pains. Not knowing what contractions were supposed to feel like, I was convinced that what I was experiencing was definitely them. I called the nurse in Labor and Delivery at the hospital, only to be told to wait awhile more since they were not coming frequently enough. To my disappointment, the small pains eventually went away. Each day I insisted upon Jeff and I taking long walks around Rexburg. These usually consisted of walking to the nearest grocery store to pick up or drop off a Redbox. Saturday passed. Sunday passed. Monday passed. Tuesday we went bowling with some friends in our ward, and then it passed. BUT early Wednesday morning, I was woken up at 5AM with some serious pains that put Saturday’s discomforts to shame. THIS WAS IT. However, one of my worst fears was to go to the hospital and have those girly little nurses turn me away and make me go home. I was insistent upon waiting out the hours until my clinic opened so that they could check me before venturing to the hospital. Hour after hour passed. These minutes were filled with Jeff’s IPhone timer, a long bath, a shower spent bent over in pain getting through each contraction, a slow process of putting on makeup, blow drying and straightening my hair while I sat on the floor in front of my long mirror frequently yelling to Jeff to make sure he knew how bad these things hurt, and Jeff running around saying “Karli, let’s go, I DO NOT want you to have Brody in our apartment.” He must have thought I was crazy. At 8:30AM, my clinic opened for calls only and I called in. I explained to them that my contractions were 3-5 minutes apart and they told me to go to the hospital right away. Relieved, Jeff took me and my hospital bag to the car to start our big day.

We were so excited. This was finally the day that we would meet the little boy that we had talked, dreamed, and laughed about for so many days. It’s a weird feeling when you are driving somewhere so important. We not only were driving towards the beginning of so many news things, but we were also driving away from the little life that we had started just a year and 4 months ago together. I remember thinking about how strange it felt to know that the next time I’d get into our little gold Hyundai we’d have a BABY in the backseat, and not only a baby, but OUR baby. What would that be like? What would that feel like? What would he look like? So many questions raced through thoughts of excitement, nervousness, and fear.

Once we got there I was told to sit in a chair and fill out paper work. What the heck? That was the most simple, but most painful task they could have told me to do at that moment. During a contraction, I couldn’t even sign my name. I’m surprised they even excepted some of those signatures.. they were slightly illegible.

I finally got checked by our first nurse. I was a “tight 3”. She admitted me to the hospital. I think she could have sent me home, but I think her heart got the best of her as she could see how much pain I was feeling. She called Dr. Prince and he told me to walk.. for two hours.. which turned out to be the longest two hours of my life. I picked this one short hallway, with chairs on one end. My routine was walk up and down the hallway twice, and then I’d know a contraction would be near so I’d sit down and endure the harsh pain. The feeling is hard to describe if you haven’t felt a contraction before. My best description would be that it is like you have a super bad stomach ache- one that comes and goes in waves- it gets really bad and then disappears, then gets really bad again and then disappears. Except multiply that stomach ache by like.. a million. It sucked. Walking that hall sucked. Jeff walked that hall with me though, each and every time. I was so grateful for him that day. I won’t lie though, I was quite envious of the fact that he was bored that day instead of in pain like I was.

Finally, after an hour and a half of walking and sitting, I quit. I was done. I got checked again and I was a “good 3”. Seriously? All that work for basically nothing. Dr. Prince arrived 45 minutes later and broke my water. What a warm, rushing, experience that was, enough said. At 4 centimeters, I wanted that epidural bad. My fears that I had built up about the huge needle were over, I just wanted these pains to disappear. The epidural.. it was heaven. I was able to text, sleep, and watch TV without even an ounce of pain. I could still tell when I was having contractions, but I definitely couldn’t feel them enough to be in discomfort. A side note- Ever since 9AM, when I was fully admitted to the hospital, my mom was on her way. She was driving the hour to the Seattle airport, flying the three hours to the Salt Lake Airport, and taking the four hour ride on the shuttle to Rexburg. She was due to be in Rexburg that night at 10:30PM. It was a mixed feeling for me. I both wanted her to make it, but at the same time I wanted this baby the heck out of me. Dr. Prince predicted I’d have the baby at 8PM that night.

At 8 centimeters, I could feel those stupid contractions again, except worse than before. The nurse gave me a small button to push that supposedly gave me more pain medicine, but I would argue that it was a placebo. That little button did nothing for me, no matter how many times I or Jeff pushed it. My epidural had run out, and I had a long road ahead of me with no hope for another dose since I was too far along. Great. Hours passed, my mom arrived (way way too happy for her own good), and I got to the long awaited 10 centimeter mark. Hooray!

It was 10:45PM. At that moment I couldn’t tell you which I was more happy for, my mom getting there on time or the fact that I was ready to push. And push I did.. for 2 hours straight. Pushed, and pushed, and pushed, and pushed, and let everyone know I was about to quit, and listened to the nurse explain to me that I was the only one that could have this baby and that quitting was really not an option, and pushed, and saw tears in my mom’s eyes, and pushed, and heard encouraging words from Jeff, and looked in the mirror at that little spot of hair that everyone was WAY to excited about, and pushed, and finally.. Dr. Prince’s voice said that most earthshakingly great sentence, “Stop pushing.” At that moment he pulled out this long armed, long legged, stiff thing out of me. I laid back on the bed and relaxed. It was over.

They placed the little thing in my arms and that thing turned into the most beautiful baby boy I had ever seen. He was so small. I’ll never forget that little face of his, that little head (that minutes before had not felt so small). I loved that little boy already so much. This was what was inside me all of those months. All of those times that I had felt a kick or a hiccup, this was him. Jeff, with tears in his eyes, kissed me and told me how extremely happy he was at that moment. That was how I felt as well, happy. Before adding Brody to our lives I had considered myself to have had experienced happiness. Now I know what happiness really feels like. What I had felt before was of no comparison at all to the way I felt when those little blue eyes looked up at me and that little head laid on my bare shoulder. I loved him and knew he was meant to come down to earth to be with Jeff and me.

My good friend, Holly, came to the hospital 15 hours after Brody arrived. Luckily, she brought her camera and captured some precious moments that I am so grateful I have.

I always want to remember how it felt to hold Brody those first few days. I was so nervous about if I was doing everything right. But at the same time, I was so sure that I was meant to take upon the great responsibility of caring for him. I didn’t sleep that first or second night. I didn’t feel tired. I didn’t want to miss anything about my new little man and I loved sitting there, standing there, and lying there just looking at him. I couldn’t get over how cute he was and how small he was and how he was really our’s and we were about to take him home to be with us forever.

I was recently asked by our ward historian to provide a little something about my experience in Primary for last year. I can’t believe that I have been the Primary President for an entire year now! Here is what I provided. I don’t know if it is exactly what she wanted, her directions were quite vague, but I tried my best.

I think I am beginning to experience bits and pieces of what it feels like to be a mom. Feeling you move inside me gives me so much comfort to know that you are growing stronger and stronger everyday. I go to sleep thinking about you and wake up thinking about you. Even though you are the most active during the night, the lack of sleep actually doesn’t bother me. My favorite part about recent nights is being woken up by one of your kicks or turns and being able to just lay there, with my hand on my growing belly, feeling all your little movements. Your dad feels you move all the time too. Whenever we are relaxing, he always has one hand on my stomach, just in case you make a little kick. He talks to you too. I don’t know what he says to you because he puts his mouth real close and whispers things to you. I ask what he says, but his reply is that it is just secrets between you and him. He loves you so much, and reminds me of that everyday. Getting your room ready for when you arrive is one of my favorite things to do lately. I love organizing and reorganizing all of your cute clothes, toys, books, and supplies. I can’t wait to finally meet you in April. I wonder what it will feel like to not have you inside of me anymore after so many months. While organizing our large storage closet the other day, the tub I was stupidly standing on tipped over, causing me to crash right on my bum. What normally would have been a small fall, was one of the most terrifying things that has happened to me in the past 6 months. I realized how important it is for me to be more careful, since I need to take care of my little guy inside of me. I sat on the couch, very still until I felt you move, reassuring me that you were okay. I look forward to when you are here so that I can look at you and know for sure that you are healthy and perfect, just the way you should be. It’s weird how you can love something so much without even laid eyes on it yet. That is the way I feel about you. You already make such a difference in both your dad’s and my lives. You make me feel important and special. I am so lucky to be able to have the opprotunity to be your mom.

Love always,
Your Mommy